Sunday 20 September 2015

OK, I'M ADDICTED

And this is what my typical day looks like..


I toss and turn on my bed, knowing in my sub-conscious that its time to wake up. So I gradually open my eyes and start to look for my best friend. Where did she go again? I get into a panic, jump up and start to look for my phone. I finally breathe a sigh of relieve after I find her in my hand bag (that’s the next best place to keep my phone when its not on me).
Like every other person suffering from the same addiction, the first I do when I wake up in the morning is to check all my social media accounts. I check my Instagram. Ah ah no likes? No new followers? Ok I really like that picture, so I scroll a bit, like some more and off I am to twitter. What’s trending on twitter? Ah! Inyanya had sex with one girl like that? What’s more, she isn’t his girlfriend? Hmm juicy. I have to go to Linda Ikeji’s blog, to get more gossip. My tummy is remainding me that’s its time to poop. So I go along with my phone, which is the best pooping companion everrrr. Omg, do you know how relaxing it is, when you are taking a dump and reading the lastest gossips on LIB? It is the best thing ever. I used to go a newspaper before but now, but my phone just keeps me company the most.

Ok I’m dressed and ready for work. Time to take a SelfieJ. One for IG, one for face book and the last one for snap chat. I don’t really post pictures on twitter, not my thing.
I am half way through the day, and I realize Omg! My phone would soon go off, I start to panic again. What am I going to do? How am I going to reply to my chats if am offline? I hate that word offline because it is not an option for me. O God, please don’t let my phone die. I beg you. So I run to my colleague and ask her to lend me her charger, and this is what I get.
“Carole why are you always looking for charger? Its either you are charging your phone or you are looking for a charger. This your phone no dey rest?”
Na wa o, what is doing this babe self, does she want my phone to die. So I tell her,
“Babe have you forgotten what I told you? Being offline is not an option”.

The day is over, and I’m just tired. But trust me, my daytime job, does not compare to the work I do on social media. I mean, all that chatting, posting pictures, updating profiles, liking pictures and posting on my time line is just exhausting. So I have my bath, check my social media accounts one last time and then keep my phone within arms reach. Then I sleep off.
 MY NAME IS CAROLE, AND I AM A PHONE AD.

If you can relate to my write up then do not even kid yourself. You are an addict also. Have a lovely day.
Image credit buzz feed.com


2 comments:

Unknown said...

You can't stop amusing me. You don't pray as part of your daily routine?

Unknown said...

You can't stop amusing me. You don't pray as part of your daily routine?